Below is an excerpt from Jack-o’-Lantern Press’s book, “Transylveinya Traveler: A Travel Guide for Monsters, Ghosts, Vampires, Aliens, Werewolves, Witches, Zombies, Demons … And Mad Scientists, Too.”
Dr. Henry Jekyll has a new and improved potion for you to try. Dr. Jekyll’s Death Potion No. 17 is longer lasting than previous formulas and offers consumers a much bigger boost of rage and insanity.
Some of the world’s most intense monsters say No. 17 contains the right ingredients in the right proportion to deliver the big bad nasty “Mr. Hyde” demeanor that only potions from Dr. Jekyll’s lab can offer.
“Will girls be screaming?” said Dr. Jekyll. “Yes. Will kids be running? Yes. Will grown men cry? Absolutely. This new formula packs a serious wallop. The good news is Death Potion No. 17 offers no health benefits whatsoever. In fact, the combination of chemicals is likely to do more harm than good. I’m thrilled about that.”
Some of the unpleasant side effects of No. 17 include elevated heart rates, hypertension, anxiety, headaches and interrupted sleep patterns. A study by Transylveinya University suggests even more exciting outcomes — severe heart palpitations, strokes and an added bonus: permanent insanity.
“Whenever I’m feeling too cheerful or content,” Jekyll said, “I take a couple sips of No. 17, and it transforms me into a raging lunatic, pushing me to turn everything and everyone upside down. Try it for yourself. You’ll be the pain of the party in no time.”
Dr. Jekyll’s Death Potion No. 17 is now available on the quack market.