Planet Zeibmoz seeking recruits to attack alien invaders from Earth

By E.T.

Staff E.T. Writer

“B” Colony on Planet Zeibmoz will be hosting a town hall meeting tomorrow night in the colony chambers to discuss the fast-approaching extraterrestrials from Earth. Representatives from every sector of the world will be in attendance.

Earlier this month, experts spotted another unidentified flying object in the sky. Now officials want to take action. Serious, epic action.

“We’re seeing Earthlings in the outskirts of their universe getting dangerously closer to ours,” said scientist Watchfir Thaskyz. “They’re just getting too close for comfort.”

Planet officials are looking for volunteers to attack the Earthlings out in space, and another set of recruits to take on their entire planet in a Michael Bay kind of way.

“We’re tired of these Earthlings trying to discover who and what we are,” said Parr Anoid, a public officer from “G” Colony. “We want volunteers who are willing and able to assist in a full-on alien invasion of their world.”

Anoid said Planet Zeibmoz is seeking experienced pilots, laser fighters and the most good-looking residents to take part in the effort to scare the Earthlings away for good.

“They wanna invade us,” said Zeibmoz Leader Itsgoodta Beedaking. “We’ll invade them.”

Some monsters are all for the invasion while others are against it.

“Why can’t we keep the fight here at home?” said a “D” Colony sludgeworker Blaaaah Egaaad. “That way we all get to enjoy the perils of war.”

Others said they like the idea of the attack on Earth because R and R there would be exotic.

“Have you seen some of the creatures on that planet?” said Notso Hansum, who lives alone in “C” Colony. “The ones they keep six feet underground are to die for. You can count me in.”

Let your mumbles and growls be heard. The town hall meeting will begin at 7201 hours tomorrow night. Be there. Or beware.