Pam
the Giant Insect was shot down in Downtown Transylveinya today. City officials
can’t move her now. They can’t break her apart and they can’t blow her up
because a blast would take out the nearby buildings. Services will take place
where the enormous monster was killed. According to members of the Downtown
Transylveinya Planning Commission, the city will turn the remains of the
creature into a mixed-use development, part playground for the kiddies -- where
they can slide down the tarsus of the insect’s leg -- and part high rise apartment
units, which will be built into the shell of the big bug. It’ll be quite a view
from up there. Most insects only live a few hours. But when Pam was exposed to
radiation and enlarged to her humongous size earlier in the day, she decided to
go out with a bang and attack the city. Boy did she ever. Long live Pam!
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