Mail carrier accepts first honors of the season

HUMAN WORLD -- A pack of hounds from Hell lay down quietly on the cool grass this afternoon, resting, a few untouched chew toys near their sides. When the mail carrier looked down for that half a second at the package he was about to deliver to double-check the address, the beasts sprung into action. The post office reported their employee missing an hour after his shift expired. Expire, it did. And so we report the first good scare of the Halloween season in the human world. Afterward, the pack of hounds went for dessert. (You can't make this stuff up.)